WEEK 1 - Online

[al2955]

the pygmalion. . . ONLINE CAPTAIN'S LOG: WEEK (1)

monday (41) survivors It had been three days since you had awoken. The ship was still quiet, except for the low hums of enigmatic machines with no apparent purpose. You awake, like usual, to dim lighting and poor rations. Perhaps being on the ship had grown monotonous — it was, perhaps, amazing how little anything seemed to happen in space, a final frontier of malaise. That monotony is crushed by a voice echoing through the narrow hallways. Reformatting . . . Reformatting . . . Reformatting complete. The Pygmalion is online. Welcome, travelers. Please assemble in the meeting room. Your presence is mandatory. Silence falls once again. A minute or so passes, and the lights around the ship finally brighten, the walls looking more alive and more unfamiliar — as if you must relearn the ship's interior once again. The robots on deck begin to make rounds, nudging and pushing at the ship's passengers to make their way to the meeting room. You hear the doors behind you lock. It seems there is only one path to take. ENTER COMMAND_

Comments

[monsieurchatastrophe]

I've never killed anyone!

[for the first time he sounds genuinely offended. he's a SUPERHERO, EMILY, GOSH]

[thatbites]

Good job.

[She honestly didn't think some 15 year old is a murderer but, whew, he sure has a list of skills.]

Half your profile still doesn't make any logical sense though. Unless you just had a really ambitious mom.

[monsieurchatastrophe]

My father, actually. My mother's...[he trails off with a shrug and a sad smile because, well, y'know] Anyway. He's got a lot of expectations.

[thatbites]

Well, you can put it to use later.

[Except... there really are some weird things in here. And that's not even referring to the high heels.]

Bad luck isn't much of a skill. Think that's just whoever did this poking fun?

[monsieurchatastrophe]

[you know those people who are really bad at lying but insist on doing it? meet adrien.]

Y...ep. Definitely. Everyone's got one joke or two on there, haven't they?

[thatbites]

[Her's literally lists 'killer sense of fashion' she would have believed him. Until he actually said it out loud.]

Sure do. Guess 'purrkour' fits in there too, right? Maybe the damsel bit and night vision too. You sure have a lot of jokey ones!

[Call out post: Adrien.]

[monsieurchatastrophe]

[ugh]

Why does everyone have to point out that one...

[he obviously means the damsel one. he's just. pouting.]

I think purrkour is supposed to be parkour, though.

[THIS DOESN'T MAKE THE REST OF IT BELIEVABLE, ADRIEN]

[thatbites]

[It's a really long and eye catching skill? Nah, it's cause it's hilarious.]

That still puts you at five jokes over everyone else. [Like, just saying. He's out not of this.] Where did the cat pun even come from? Ugh, a really bad one at that.

[monsieurchatastrophe]

Maybe it's to make it equal to how long my list is? [because. seriously.] No idea. It's pretty catastrophic. [adrien no]

[thatbites]

[Adrien.]

Okay, no more of that allowed going forward.

[monsieurchatastrophe]

Sure, sure. Sorry.

[he does not sound sorry and he does not mean it. he is puntastic. it's awful.]

[thatbites]

Maybe it's there because you're so easy to make fun of.

[Actually making cat puns. Way to be a nerd.]

[monsieurchatastrophe]

[... he can't... technically... disagree...]

I think that's what the "bad luck" is about.

[aka he gets made fun of as chat so much. so much. at least it's all water off a duck's back beyond a few pouts]

[thatbites]

[Okay, she smiles at that.]

Guess we know that one isn't a joke now. Just got to work through the rest.

[monsieurchatastrophe]

Ooor we could call it Schroedinger's list and leave it at that?

[adrien is that a sneaky cat pun. bad adrien. bad.]