WEEK FIVE

[al2955]

the pygmalion. . . ONLINE CAPTAIN'S LOG: WEEK (5)

monday - thursday (33) survivors It had been merely a week since the last trial, but you find yourself faced with a new week on The Pygmalion. When you awaken, you will find the handcuff around your wrist gone. The robot in the cafeteria has prepared another breakfast of various foods. (OOC: Please submit your murder proposals by 9 PM EST Tuesday.) taken list profiles private conversations setting rulebook murder proposals ENTER COMMAND_

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[al2955]

[It looks like a sealed cardboard box with a large question mark painted on every side.]

[thanatosincarnate]

{ That... doesn't look suspicious in the slightest. Except it does... like a lot. Whatever, if it's dangerous he would want to be opening it instead of Elizabeth, so he will be encroaching on it now. }

... What sort of nonsense is this now?

[brooches]

Be careful!

[ Elizabeth isn't going to march in there - especially when mystery boxes appear. She's not curious for her own sake, but she if this is something that could... ah... benefit them, they would need to get this before anyone else does, right? ]

What - what is it?

[al2955]

[The lid of the box explodes when Arumat attempts to open it!

...luckily, it just showers both of them with confetti.

Look inside?]

[thanatosincarnate]

Whatever they will throw at us, I can ta--

{ He looks annoyed when they're showered in confetti, brushing a bit of it off in hurried movements. But he doesn't bother with it too much. At least this isn't glitter, it'd be hell to remove from his hair. }

...We will see what's inside in a moment.

{ Time to look in... }

[brooches]

[ Insert girly bitch scream. Please, I hope this all wakes everyone up. She instinctively flinches, but upon the suddenness of it, she's now picking the confetti out of here... ]

Oh, enough games! On with it!

[ Grumpy, grumpy. Not at him, just. You know. The confetti. ]

[al2955]

[Stacked tightly in the box is a plethora of colorful objects. Upon closer inspection, they appear to be...

...dildos. Lots and lots of dildos. At least three dozen of them, maybe more, all in various colors and sizes and shapes and material. Some are crudely carved of wood, others are incredibly life-like and detailed. There's plastic ones, silicon ones, battery-powered vibrators, electronic futuristic ones, even a couple made of chocolate and candy. At least half of them appear to be filled with mysterious liquids judging from their appearance and weight.

Enjoy!]

[thanatosincarnate]

.......

{ His face is suddenly lighting up completely beet red at the scandalous arrangement of items. He grits his teeth as pure anger (and embarrassment) flash across golden irises. He steps back and holds up his hand to the dreaded box. }

Keep your distance, civilian.

{ Because if he gets the chance he'll try to burn the damned things. }

[brooches]

[ He says keep her distance.

She doesn't listen.

Ever.

It seems things aren't deadly, so she's quick to scramble forward and grab the box to tilt it towards her and that's a bunch of dicks.

And that's a gasp and definitely her fumbling the box and alllll the dildos pour out onto the table and floor. Did some of them turn on in the process? Double points.

Either way, that scream was definitely nothing compared to how she turns and looks away, covering her face. ]

Those are - that can't be - ... oh my God.

[ If there was anything else in the box, let it pour out pls because those dildos are definitely at Liz's ankles. ]

I am so tired of this hellish ship!

[al2955]

[Nothing else in the box except dildos!

Who wants the Batman one.]

[refactor]

[ you asked for a hero and instead you get jack ]

[ It's not quite the time of night where Jack heads to his room to go to sleep yet, though it's definitely close. As such, he's probably on his way somewhere else when he hears that scream in the conference room. He's actually surprisingly quick to respond, since he throws open the doors as if he were concerned, gun even at the ready, but if there were any doubts about Jack having a moment of heroism, his words quickly dismiss the idea. ]

Woah did someone friggin bite it alr—

[ But as he takes in the scene more fully, his arm falls from being at the ready to shoot, and he looks at the assortment of dildos at Elizabeth's ankles. ]

—Wow. What's with the literal sea of dicks?

[thanatosincarnate]

{ He begins to just crush some of them at the heel of his foot, with no mercy. Elizabeth's too close for him to fire off a spell. }

I don't know what you expected after that ... reveal.

{ He glares at the rest of those... things he hasn't gotten to yet, but really he's not going to try to destroy all of them. He doesn't have time for this and he's too done to deal with this anymore, so he begins to consider leaving the room.

But then Jack busts in.

Arumat just brings a hand to his head. }

Someone thought they were being funny and they weren't in the slightest. That is all.

[brooches]

[ You could say Arumat was

ballbusting.



Elizabeth looks disgraced, Arumat is buttmad over the whole ordeal and here comes Jack to break the ice. She peers between her fingers and luckily is hiding the red in her face. ]

What he said.

[ But, she has to clarify. ]

They were in a box on the table. I thought it could have been an item like the luminol or the fingerprint kit. Har har, surprise it's... phallic objects.....

[refactor]

Ohhhh my god. Someone really just left these laying out here? That's- That's the funniest prank I've heard in a while.

[ Jack starts snickering, since it really is funny to play with the expectation that it would be something useful, so he has to give the mastermind here credit. But mostly, he just walks closer and ends up bursting into the sort of wheezing laughter that's borderline obnoxious pretty much as soon as he spots the Batman one. ]

Holy— Is that one shaped like a person?

[ You know who's going to pick it up? It's definitely Jack. He's going to wash his hands in boiling water for about thirty minutes after, but this is definitely the funniest thing he's seen this week, and he's busting up into the sort of laughter where you're only catching a few words in between laughs. ]

It looks like-- Like, holy shit, like, a superhero? Or something? Wh- Who's been showing Al the— [ He cracks up even more here, so give him a second ] The really, really friggin' weird parts of the internet? It's a guy-- Jesus, who would even use this?

[thanatosincarnate]

{ He grunts, irritated. It's not like it's unexpected someone would be amused by this... mess-- in fact the worst part was he could understand why it'd have someone in stitches. But, it doesn't mean he wanted to be around in the conversation when someone was. This was scandalous enough already. }

Some of the designs are tasteless -- then again, all of them are.

{ He grumbles. }

If someone has been influencing the AI to do something like this, then it's good for them I don't know who they are.

{ Otherwise there'd be a fight breaking out now. What have their lives come to, honestly? }