cradleproject | WEEK 8

[If it were anyone but Adam he'd have punched him in the face for sneaking up on him. As it is, he lazily tilts his head back to look at him before he grins.]

Nope. [It's mostly an answer to be contradictory, especially given while one hand is doodling in the notebook now the other is reaching into the bag of wrapped peanut butter cups to offer a few to his friend. May as well. His grip on the pen is a little tight and his eyes are looking just past Adam instead of at him. It's only day two.] Whatever gave you that idea?

[ Adam grabs the candy and moves to sit down next to him. Thanks for not punching him. If he weren't worried about Luke (and himself), he would probably leave him alone. As it is, that doesn't seem like the best solution. ]

I dunno. Should have guessed you're just a masochist. [ He eats the peanut butter cups and glances to the notebook every so often, but he's trying to respect his privacy. Trying. ] Is this your emo phase?

[Truth be told Luke's been keeping an eye on Adam and when he doesn't know where the boy is he's subconsciously looking for him. After their discussion he's been mildly worried about such things, too. But they're both good at Not Talking About It and he actually laughs. The notebook, it seems, is a letter though Adam won't be able to make out who it's to.]

I'm not wearing enough eyeliner for this to be my emo phase, but I can't deny the first part. [He nods to the tablet.] When we had a day to ourselves that we didn't have to worry about getting eaten, sometimes Thalia and I would browse shopping centers. She always liked to listen to music when she could. [The times were very, very rare.] Call it nostalgia, but I think this came out after…everything.

[ Like in his room, Adam doesn't pry about the letters. Those are too personal and there's no need to read it if it's not for him. The anecdote makes him smile a little, glad they could sometimes have days when they were just kids. ]

Do you like this sort of music or do you like it because she liked it? [ He understands the latter particularly well, and he's wondering if there's a little more to Luke's relationship with Thalia. ]

[Unknown to Adam there sure are some letters to him in there. But Luke's always careful not to let on to those things. Forcing himself to think of the good days has helped recently.]

You've never met Thalia, obviously, but Thalia was usually in charge of our music. [He's drumming his pen in time with the sound, and even if he's not looking at Adam he's engaged in the conversation.] This was always more her scene than mine. Guess it just grew on me after a while. [It never occurred to him to tell her no.] When you spend all of your time with somebody you just end up sharing. Sharing food, sharing space, sharing music tastes…so maybe it's both.

[It absolutely remains the latter though. This would never be his first thought.]

[ That sounds awfully familiar. It could be that he's projecting or it could be that the reason Luke is evasive with Thalia is the same reason that he's evasive with Ronan. (He really hopes that he and Luke aren't so similar that they like the same sorts of people.) ]

Maybe. It's comforting, right? [ Because Adam may sometimes listen to loud shitty EDM in his room to fall asleep. ] Ronan always liked to blast his godawful music. When it's too quiet here, sometimes I play it. [ He might be implying something. ]

[This needs to stop. But he slowly nods and pops another piece of candy in his mouth in lieu of really answering at first.]

This place is way too quiet way too often. [That is to say he gets it. There's a pause and he can't help but smirk.] That mean you're subjecting me to Ronan's bad taste eventually? [He's leaving the real subject untouched for the moment. However…] Sometimes it's better to pretend I'm just off on a quest and when I get back to Camp they'll be waiting for me and it'll be another summer session. They'd burn a shroud without my body in it and then I'd probably have another sword lesson with some of the younger campers. [A pause.] It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of but I'm doing it anyway.

[But to get off that subject…] Makes you miss him less, doesn't it?

Not unless you want your ears to bleed. [ He isn't that cruel. He looks over when Luke describes his fantasy and he feels unreasonably sad. Like Luke is dying in front of him. He wishes he could tell him that maybe it is waiting for him, maybe it could happen. But it can't. It's unfair. ]

It's not stupid. [ That's all he can say. ] If it motivates you to complete this quest, then it's worth it. [ This topic is way too much, so he nods even though it's an embarrassing question. He looks away, face slightly red. ]

Helps me go to sleep. Like I'm in the BMW again. It's sort of a connection, isn't it? The same wavelengths reaching all the way up to here. Like there's a point in time when Thalia is listening to the same song or band and it's like you're together again. [ He pauses. ] That's the stupidest thing you've ever heard.

[He's avoiding Adam's gaze for that reason. The longer he's here and the longer he's alive, the more he realizes how much borrowed time he's on. It's not worth thinking about for too long but…well, he sure does think about it more than he says.]

I'll be the judge of that. [Whether he means about bleeding ears or if it's stupid, he doesn't say.] It helps keep me a little grounded instead of repeating history, if you catch my drift. [But he's moving on and he looks up, grinning softly.]

You're from a world where your boyfriend manifests stuff from dreams. I think that's probably more of a reality for you than me. [The sentence is low like he's not sure Adam wants him blabbing about his assumptions about Ronan, but he's confident enough.] If time's still moving without us somehow, Thalia's out in the world instead of at Camp. She could very well have discovered this album by now. So it's not the stupidest thing I've heard. [He tries for a teasing grin.] Trust me. It's kind of a cool theory.

[ Adam nods and grabs for more candy, glad that Luke has some method of coping with all this. That's really all he can hope for.

He doesn't correct him on any point, though. It's not like he's wrong. ] You don't have to make me feel better. [ He throws a peanut butter cup at his head. ] I bet she thinks about you when she listens to music too. After all, you share everything. Even thoughts, right?

I don't have to do anything. And who said it was about making you feel better? [He turns his head and catches the candy with his mouth before pulling it out to unwrap and eat. The task is enough to keep his hand occupied and his gaze on something else for the time being.]

...if anything, she might just think I'm a monster like Annabeth did for a while. Remember the good memories like I did but realize there's nothing left. I mean...she was gone for almost six years. Maybe our thoughts were way too different after that.

And anyway I thought about what you said. About how seeing her would probably be more for me than her. Maybe you're right and it's not fair. [He shakes his head.] Man. I could just send her a bunch of lyrics instead of a letter. That'd probably make more sense.

[ There's an automatic cheer that escapes him when Luke catches the candy. It's a teenage boy thing, alright. He's grinning when he answers the question. ] Don't pull that act on me, Castellan.

[ Then it falters as he listens to what Luke says about Thalia. He knows there's not a lot he can say about it, given how important and intimate that relationship was. He isn't sure he has any experience in something like that, spending formative years with just one or two people day after day. He's surprised when Luke mentions actually thinking about what he said. Sometimes he assumes what he says just goes in one ear and out the other. ]

Lyrics might be more meaningful. But... when I said that, I didn't understand how important you two were to each other. You know her best, but I don't think anyone can brush off someone they spent so much of their life with. If she had done what you did, would you feel any different about her?

[Even with the grim topic there's a bright grin. Luke still likes to impress even if it's something stupid like catching a treat, like he's a trained seal or something. He's also not acknowledging that because…yeah, it was to help Adam a little bit.

Despite that…the Thalia thing is at the front of his mind and he's still not sure how to handle that.]

Thalia was the first friend I'd met that was like me. [A demigod, he means.] I think there's always a sense of loyalty no matter what. That's how things always were. It's hard to say if I'd feel different because I can never imagine her doing what I did…which is the other stupid thing I did. I thought she'd join my side after she was revived. That was my selling point to get the fleece back after we used it on Kronos. If we brought Thalia back, she could help us. [It's easy to see it's more than that. He wanted to bring her back, period.] Let's pretend the spots were switched. No, I wouldn't feel that different about her but I'm. […nah, he stops completely.] It doesn't matter much because it's debatable if she'd even be allowed to talk to me ever again.

[ So he was right, Luke almost definitely feels more for Thalia than he's let on. He can also understand why he hasn't let that on—he's dead, she's stuck as a teenager. It can't happen. Luke's (after-)life keeps on getting more depressing. ]

That's not entirely fair. To think you have something she doesn't that wouldn't change things. [ He stops eating the candy now, frowning. ] Why wouldn't she be allowed to talk to you? Because she's a Hunter?

I never said I play fair, Parrish. Besides, she has a little more sense than I do. That right there would be the difference. [But he sighs, finally turning down the music a little and scrubbing a hand over his face.]

...the Hunters of Artemis have to take this oath to swear off men completely. I don't know if that means talking to men at all or...other stuff, but I don't think it's worth the risk considering what Artemis would do if someone broke her vow. [He peers out from between his fingers.] When we were kids, the Hunters tried to recruit her. Thalia told them no because she didn't want to leave me.

[ Adam grimaces a little at that explanation. That sounds way too extreme. And even worse for Luke. It's like the universe didn't want him to think anything could go right for him. ]

What... would she do? [ He tries to catch Luke's eye, then holds out a candy. ] I mean, I'm sure she can talk to men. That would be crazy.

[He's not making eye contact because talking about Thalia is Difficult...but he takes the candy anyway, rolling it over his knuckles this way and that.]

There's this story about a pair of twins. Agrius and Oreius. Their mother was ordered by Aphrodite to fall in love and when she said no and went to Artemis, Artemis let let become a huntress. Aphrodite interfered and bewitched the young woman to fall in love with a bear instead. Obviously when Artemis found out she wasn't too happy and abandoned the girl. Didn't even give her a chance to explain herself. There're other stories about Atermis banishing hunters and turning them into bears because they were seduced and slept with one of the gods. She doesn't take to that kind of stuff too lightly, and I'd really rather not risk Thalia turning into a bear for whatever reason.

[...it's not so much he's worried about Thalia talking to men. He's more curious what would happen if the two of them met again. But like hell he'll tell Adam that.]

[ He's always known mythology is weird but it's worse when it's Real Life and this is a genuine concern. He's just going to take a moment to process that. ]

I mean, that's fair. She's probably had enough of turning into things. But a letter can't hurt, right? You could disguise your name. Lucy. [ Doing his best to make this less difficult, possibly making everything worse. ] I doubt you're the only one who needs closure.

[ He nudges at him with his elbow. ] I'd help make sure it gets sent off. Even though you probably have some natural talent in message delivery?

[At least there's a snort of amusement.] Could always just say it's from Annabeth. I think she'd recognize my handwriting anyway. [But he's not wrong. They both probably need the closure and he's about to say such when there's a nudge from Adam's elbow, not to mention the less than subtle hint about his godly parentage.]

Aren't you hilarious. [But it is a little funny. If you squint.] I'm pretty sure I could find a way to get this to her if I really wanted. [If he had time. He's not sure he does and that's why he finally looks at him.] ...ever been to Long Island? It's a little under four-hundred miles from Virginia. Maybe one last road trip before college claims you?

[If there's one person he'd trust with these letters, it's Adam. Part of him wonders if the boy could see through the Mist given his experience with magic and leylines. That would make this much, much easier.]

[ Adam grins and he starts to think up questions for him, like if you can always send a text message when he's around. But he'll save those hilarious jokes for later. Instead he frowns a little bit at the question because of what it implies. Luke's death weighs on his mind more than it should, but thinking about the future is always the worst.

He doesn't have the time or money to take a road trip, but Gansey and Blue have already been planning one so he nods. There's a part of him that doubts it would even exist where he's from, but who knows? Apparently they keep it hidden pretty well. ] Never been, so I guess it's time. I did say I'd like to meet Annabeth. Think they'd accept Opal as a peacemaker? She can speak Latin and, uh, some other ancient language.

[Part of him instinctually knows that based on what he and Adam have spoken about, but on the other hand he's likely to force Adam to do it solely because a.) he's selfish and b.) he thinks it's probably important for Adam to spend time with his friends. It's something he wishes he'd done more.]

Mmmm I dunno. That'd depend on what other ancient language she knows. [But he's too busy grinning for anyone to take him seriously.] Maybe she can meet Grover, who knows? I'm not sure what he's up to these days and Annabeth would probably like her, too. We've got a couple of satyrs around Camp but they're all guys. The nymphs would probably be fascinated, too.

WEEK 8

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