cradleproject | WEEK 14 - I have been — and always shall be

WEEK 14 - I have been — and always shall be — your friend.

the pygmalion. . .

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CAPTAIN'S LOG:
WEEK (14)

monday

(41) survivors

You stand with your friends, your family, and your enemies, shoulder to shoulder. The deceased and the living are the same, now, and you've been reunited with the person trapped on the opposite ship.

You have four choices.

Four options laid before you - five, if you're smart about it. You have the option of staying on the Nuwa, a ship pre-programmed to land somewhere safe, soon, and then it's your's for the taking. You have the option of entering the Nuwa's virtual reality and crafting your own perfect world, but knowing it was a perfect world created by your own hand. Your third option is one of the Cradles, a machine created to bring you bliss, and permit you the dream you've always wanted, without the knowledge it's a virtual reality. Your fourth option lays in front of you, on the bridge of the Nuwa, and it's a tear in the fabric of reality, but you can see your home waiting for you. It looks idyllic, perfect, just the way you'd want it to be. Your fifth option lies in another tear - the tear of a friend. Perhaps their heart is kind enough to take in a stray.

The choice is your's to make, and whatever you choose, know that, for the first time in fourteen weeks, it's your choice.

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[ Well, alright. He'll let the empousa thing go.

If he were less selfish at the moment, he might tell Luke that he doesn't have to do it if he doesn't want. But he does have to. Sorry Luke. ]

You're worrying yourself. [ And Adam. ] I know you're not from there, but... if we're soulmates, that means we belong together. We've found each other which means nothing can keep us apart anymore.

[SIGH.]

...so you actually did read it, huh? [He looks a little embarrassed but he's not backing down from what he meant.] You might be right, but one of us has actually dealt with Zeus before and thinks he could very easily just find us and split us up again. [He's not...entirely...serious, but it is a fair point.]

Tell me I'm making a good choice and that this is the best way to do things. [He's guilty about leaving Annabeth behind, too, but he won't say that.] I don't know if I could ever go back remembering you and never being able to get back, but...[A shrug.] It's something I remembered, I thought maybe it was too much but it sort of sounds like you and me, doesn't it?

[ There's a smile that says yes, he read it. He is slightly embarrassed about it but he got most of the embarrassment out earlier and how can see that it's pretty true. He likes having something to call Luke that's a lot more fitting than friend. ]

If Zeus tries to smite us where I come from, Gansey's going to personally find him and chat him up. Don't worry. [ He has zero doubt that Gansey could convince Zeus to stop being mean.

There's a slight sigh then. He doesn't know why Luke is asking this of him, but he presses their shoulders together again. ] If it's what you and I both want, then I think it's the best possible choice. I told you I'd give you everything and I will. [ Then he presses his head to Luke's. ] Yeah, it does. That's why I think this is the only choice. I don't know what it's like without you anymore.

[He stares...and something else occurs to him.] Gods, that means I finally get to meet Gansey and Blue too, doesn't it. They're definitely in that tear, aren't they? [This is going to be a nightmare for literally everyone except for Luke and Adam and he doesn't care too much.]

But of course it's what we both want. [He leans in as well and just like that everything's normal again. Except for the part where it isn't.] ...I had to tell Annabeth I wasn't going back. She'll be okay without me. [He's not sure if he's stating or asking, really.]

Of course they are. [ He has no idea how a tear works but he knows in every universe there's Gansey and Blue. ] They'll like you a lot. Well, Blue might not. She's kind of like Ronan.

[ But oh well. He waits for something more, but then Luke kind of leaves that up in the air. From what he's heard, Annabeth seems pretty capable. ] Is that what you're worried about? I think she knows how to handle herself. You taught her how, after all.

Which means she's probably kinda like Thalia and I can handle that. If you think I'm worried about Blue you're totally mistaken, dude. I'll make nice with your friends probably.

[He's still chewing his lip as he thinks about Annabeth though.] I know she knows how to handle herself. Did I tell you that she flipped me over her shoulder when I finally saw her in person on the Nuwa? It's been a year since I died. But it's just...what would you do if like...I dunno, Gansey died and was dead for a while only you got to see him again just to find out he was going somewhere else and this would be the only chance you get to see him again?

[ Adam gives him a challenging smile, though he's sure Luke will grow on all of them. Even Ronan. ]

... No, you didn't. [ Why?? Stop hurting Luke. The question about Gansey makes him frown, though, because he has lost Gansey and it's still a little sore. But he does seem to seriously consider it. ]

If... I knew he couldn't stay alive if he came back with me, and what he wanted was to go somewhere to make something for himself... I'd accept it. It'd be easier on me, too. I wouldn't have to think about him being gone forever, I'd know he was somewhere still alive and making the most of it. I'd try to spend as much time with him as I could, but I guess it'd never be enough.

[A shrug. It's how Annabeth expresses her affection for people okay, it's fine? But he doesn't like that look and he patiently waits, listening to Adam's explanation. Part of it makes him grin to himself because it's an explanation that also gets Adam what he wants, first and foremost, but…it makes sense. He knows Annabeth would want the best for him (he hopes) and he knows that it would be more problematic for him to go back after all this time.

He's spent time with her and managed to get in a more appropriate goodbye, holding on as long as he can. But now…isn't it like he told Elizabeth? Baby birds need to fall in order to learn to fly. He's not a bird, but maybe he's ready anyway.]

Smooth answer. [He bunches up his shoulders a little, looking at their hands.] …she'll be okay. She has Percy, and she has the others I think. There's a lot that's happened since I was gone. I'll tell you about it later. I guess I'm just going to miss her even more now. Is that bad?

[ He does mean it, though. He'd never make Gansey return to somewhere he'd be dead. It'd be like killing him all over again. So he raises his eyebrows at Luke's reply, wondering if he really doesn't believe him. ]

She will be. But no, it's not bad. I think I'd worry if you weren't going to miss her more. [ If there were a chance that Luke could go back alive with her, he might let him go, but... he just squeezes his hand more. ] At least it's a better parting, right? I hope you told her I'd take care of you.

I don't need a keeper, Adam. [Except that he apparently does, and he apparently has resigned to letting Adam be that person. They've taken care of each other since they made their agreement nearly three months ago. They'll continue to do that.] But I mentioned you, yeah.

You know...at first you really reminded me of her. You're both really important to me. You don't think Ronan could dream me a way to keep in touch with her, do you?

[ Adam just gives him a disbelieving look. He knows Luke could take care of himself once they get to Adam's relatively safe world, but nah. This has been working out so far. He smiles a little bit when Luke says he's important; he's still not used to hearing it.

But the question makes him think, looking like he's trying to work it out logically. ] I think he could. I've told you how powerful he is. Now that he's been somewhere like this and met her, why not? He dreams impossible things all the time. [ He's starting to figure out how difficult this is for Luke. He reaches over with his free hand to touch at his cheek. ]

Will that help or... Is there something more?

He dreamed your kid. I think I can buy that. [He leans into Adam's hand, staring at him for a moment before nodding.] That's all I want. I don't want to lose her again if there's a way I can keep that open. Let her decide when to cut me off. Maybe there's a dream mailbox or something that we can create that'll send letters to anybody in any universe at any time.

I know it's irrational to think that I might disappear. But what about my powers? Am I still going to be a demigod in Henrietta? What about monsters? Stuff like that.

[ Adam shrugs. That was an accident. When Ronan means to do something, he can definitely do it. ] Letters might be too old-fashioned for Ronan. We'll have to talk about it with him. It might take a lot of energy from Cabeswater and we still don't know what to do since its physical form is gone. It'll be a process. [ But that's not important right now. ]

But we'll make it happen, okay? Because you're family and I'd do anything to make you happy. [ So if Luke wants something else, he can say it. ]

I don't know the answers to any of those, but I think Gansey would have found monsters if they existed in our world. The only ones we've ever seen have come from Ronan and... the demon, but that's not the same. We can speculate all we want but we're not gonna know until we get there.

Magical text messages then, whatever. We'll figure something out and if Ronan fights me on this…[It's a very empty threat. He just wants to make sure, but Adam's reassuring and it's enough to calm him down.

In a way, it's a lot for Adam to promise that he'd do anything to make Luke happy. Then again, Luke would do the same for Adam so perhaps it's not too much. In the end, he shifts to keep an eye on the Barns, contemplative and quiet. Is there anything else he wants? Probably. He just doesn't know what it is yet.]

…you know the same's true for me, right? Whatever happens out there. I'm in it for the long-haul when we get back so…if you want me to go to Cambridge, we'll look for a place at Cambridge. Otherwise I'll figure it out.

[You don't go through a life or death situation without walking away a little co-dependent. Or maybe that's just them.] Gansey probably wouldn't have found monsters by the way. They hide in the Mist and unless he's got the Sight he wouldn't see them. They'd show up as something else. And anything that comes out of Ronan's dreams I'll take down. [He gives him a playfully exasperated look.] Is that Adam for "Luke, shut up you're worrying about nothing"?

Come on. He's an asshole but he's got a heart. Maybe he has people he wants to talk to anyway. [ He has to be a little defensive of his boyfriend. He lets go of Luke's face to let him look at the Barns. ]

I want you at Cambridge. [ He's just not ready to let go yet and honestly might not ever be at this point. If Luke doesn't want to separate then they don't have to. ] Things'll be normal there. Easier to think about what we want.

[ And if Luke wants something else they can figure that out. ] You don't know Gansey. [ But he'll know soon enough. ] Besides, you're not worrying about nothing. You're kind of breaking the laws of... everything, actually, by stepping through there. And since I'm not the one going to an entirely new world, I guess it doesn't matter if I say I think it's worth it to try, but...

I have a good feeling about it, alright? I don't get those often and it's not rational at all, but I think we've... you've earned it. You've done enough heroic things to get whatever life you choose.

Of course Ronan has a heart. I've seen the dream version of the Barns, remember? Also people who're nice to animals can't be all that bad. Chainsaw's not going to peck me to death in my sleep, right?

[All joking aside, he huffs faintly.] Adam I hate to tell you but I don't think either of us knows what normal means. But I think it'll be easier to think about what we want, easier for Ronan to know somebody's looking after you...that sort of thing. It'll kinda be like being here again except hopefully nobody's gonna try to kill us.

I don't mind breaking laws, but I'm a little more careful of consequences after...everything. [But his thumb runs over the knuckles of Adam's hand that he's still holding and he sighs to himself.] A few people have told me that lately. Guess I'm still getting used to hearing it. After everything, I think I just want a life to relax for a little while and figure out what I can do. Be with people I care about. Be astonished by the fact I can live past twenty-three. It's simple but...maybe Annabeth was right. Maybe I really have always pushed myself too hard.

[A pause.] I'd have to be an asshole to squash your good feeling, wouldn't I?

We're staying at my shitty apartment, not the Barns, remember? So you don't have to worry about her. While you're sleeping at least. [ There's a pause. ] That wasn't the Barns, anyway. It was somewhere else. Don't tell Ronan.

[ Oops. Moving on. He scowls. ] No one needs to look after me and he knows that. I'm the one watching out for you. But we can always get a pet if you want something to care for. [ Maybe planning their domestic life? Sorry about that. ]

Yeah, you would. Not that I'm not used to you being an asshole anyway. [ He's quiet for a moment but he stops looking at the portal in favor of looking at Luke. Slowly, he moves to wrap his free arm around Luke's neck, an embrace while their hands are still linked. He's holding him tightly. ] I'm glad you can have that with me. The things you want. This was all worth it since I met you, even if I'm failing all my classes because of the weeks I've missed.

The one above the church...how much am I gonna hate that by the way? I'm still not convinced I won't light on fire the minute I get near it. [He looks curious then when Adam admits it wasn't the Barns.] If that wasn't the Barns then where was it?

[He rolls his eyes.] Can we maybe get a cat? They seem low-maintenance. Gives me something to do while you're at class and I lose my mind with options. [You'd think he'd be joking but no. Maybe he really does want a cat. Why the hell are they planning this, this is actively the worst.]

Half the reason you like me is because I'm an asshole, admit it. [But he shuts up suddenly when Adam moves, and he doesn't wait long before hooking his chin over Adam's arm/shoulder.] I can't believe you're thinking about school right now. Way to kill the moment, Parrish. [He's teasing, but his free hand comes up to rest on Adam's back and bunch his shirt a little in his fist.] ...I'm going to be happy there. I might not be entirely happy just because I'll miss everything and it'll be weird but I'll be happy. That's more than I've had for a really, really long time. Now do you believe me when I say you gave me my life back?

Ronan's never once been struck by lightning and he's basically a false idol. You'll be fine. The church bells might wake you up on Sunday, but it's kind of peaceful. [ Maybe Luke won't find it peaceful. Whatever, they only have to deal with it for a few more months. ]

... I'd like a cat. [ A lot of consideration went into this. He's more of a dog person but he can kind of imagine Luke with a cat and it's... endearing. ] We'll go get one from an animal shelter once we're settled in.

And you're an asshole who just asked for a cat to play with. [ Just pointing that out. He presses his cheek to Luke's and lets himself relax into the hug. ] I guess. But I haven't given you much more than you've given me. Do you think we're finally equal?

Basically and actually beaing aren't the same thing, you know. [He pauses to think on that.] Church bells might not be bad...I'll probably grow to hate it if I ever decide to sleep like a real person, but you'll probably sleep right through it won't you?

[He seems pleased.] A small black one. Or a big black one, I don't care. This just comes right back to you bringing home strays but a shelter cat probably needs us more than anything else.

Who says I'm getting a cat just to play with though? Maybe I'll teach him to attack or something. Guard-cat. It's worth trying isn't it? [But he's right. And Adam's always been right, Luke's pretty pathetic and kind of soft. He's content this way and they probably look ridiculous but you know what, fuck it. They survived something brutal, and this is real. This is real happiness and a real good thing that won't get taken from him.] You won't be satisfied until we're actually equal, will you?

How often do you think I can sleep that late on Sundays? [ Late being like 8AM. ] Before you know it, we'll be in an apartment that you like. All I want is somewhere close to school, you can pick the rest.

Am I really bringing home the stray when you already have one in mind? [ He can wait approximately one second before giving his opinion. ] I don't care how old it is, as long as it needs a good home.

[ Yes he's developed a fondness for strays somehow. He snorts at Luke's guard-cat suggestion and pulls back slightly to look at him. ] So that's what you're going to do while I'm in class. [ He seems to accept it because he's rolling his eyes. ] Not yet? [ That's alright. He has plenty of time to work on being equal to Luke. His free hand moves under Luke's chin like he's a cat. ]

You ready?

Invest in earplugs. [He doesn't mind that though.] We'll apartment-hunt. Maybe I'll get a job. Or I'll just make money magically appear if my powers are still in tact.

And yes you're bringing home the stray and the stray is bringing home another stray, so therefore you're bringing home two strays. I'm just saying...bet a lot of people look for kittens and forgets that older cats need a home, too. [Maybe he's projecting on this metaphorical cat, who knows.] We'll spoil the shit out of it, it'll be fine.

That's exactly what I'm going to do. [With Adam's hand under his chin though Luke's eyes close just a bit and he looks every bit cat-like. There's a short pause...and he moves, pressing a kiss to Adam's forehead before pulling away.] Not yet, but close enough. [Whether that's to them being equal or being ready he doesn't say.] Wanna go find Ronan and get going?

If you can make money magically appear, I think the stray was worth the investment. [ He only likes Luke for his money yeah. He nudges at his side. ] You'd still have to get a job though.

[ Luke isn't obvious at all. Still: ] I think I like older cats better. [ But they will spoil it the same way he will spoil Luke. He smiles when Luke closes his eyes, but the kiss is unexpected and he's flustered enough to let Luke pull away. He stares at Luke for a long moment before nodding, bumping their shoulders together as he leads Luke off on their search for Ronan. ]

Time to go home.

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WEEK 14 - I have been — and always shall be — your friend.

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